What would you do?

Good morning!

I’ve slept on my anger and let it go away. Now I’m back in a funny mood so it’s all good. BUT…I have decided…for a plethora of reasons…to make a huge change in my plans.

To that end, I’ve been taking roads that I had never considered navigating. One of the turns has me asking my most recent ex husband to consider a one time payment of the balance of my alimony that would benefit both him and myself.

I’m not happy about that and I may still yet back out if negotiations should downhill and it looks like it won’t be worth it to me. I made a fair offer, I assure you. It was so fair that he jumped on it. But, should he get in the mood to haggle, I’ll push away from that particular table. My plan will not change, I’ll simply have to set course on a different road. By the way, all roads lead to Chicago.

All I wanted to do was to be with my daughter and my ex husband has done a number on her while she is in a particularly pliable condition. That’s all I can say without breaking confidentiality but trust me, I wanted to be with my daughter to help her through it. Now that the little Italian wart dude has manipulated my daughter in the way he has…I can safely say that he has attacked my very last vulnerability and like Aragon in ‘Lord of the Rings, I have decided to ride out amongst the Orks and meet Sauron’s army head on.

That translates into a move to Chicago. This decision was not made without careful consideration. I had to list some pros and cons to be sure that I was doing the right thing so I did.

MOVE TO CHICAGO: PROS

1. All of my children make NUMEROUS trips to Chicago and I have enough of short, round and bald’s family members who would keep me abreast of when the kids were there if no one else did. That’s a guarantee to see them on holidays.

2. I have friends and family in Chicago, I know the city and it IS my home after all.

3. This would drive my PERFIDIOUS, DUPLICITOUS AND SURREPTITIOUS INVERTEBRATE of an ex-husband, not to mention his corpulent, addlepate miscreant cohort absolutely BONKERS!

4. I LOVE Chicago in the springtime!

5. CUBS GAME AT WRIGLEY!

6. I don’t discuss the Sears Tower much in Atlanta but I would think that in Chicago, there would be a LOT of opportunities to, in protest, continue to refer to the tallest building in the country as “The Sears Tower”.

7. If I asked for directions to a guitar shop, I will not be sent to a “gud tar shop”.

8. Many, many more men in Chi-Town…and they are men of some quality. (And I already know where a few of them are.

9. EXCELLENT radio stations.

10. One word…OPRAH. My antics could keep her busy for a weeks worth of shows.

11. Other “First Wife’s” will live vicariously through me as they watch me leave my exile in Georgia and move alarmingly close to my bully of a cheating ex and his freak of the fenales. Other “First Wives” (and some husbands as well!) will understand the havoc wreaked upon an emotional terrorist when the terror victim decides to say, “Let’s ROLL!”

12. Chicago has some of the best museums in the world and I ADORE museums.

13. Vienna Beef

14. I want to stare at the Bean some more.

15. Many more sailboats and a lake so big that you sail away from the glaring eyes of the people on the land. Lake Lanier is nice, but if I fell out at any spot on it, I could easily breaststroke to the shore.

16. SNOW! I may eventually get sick of it, but it will take a few Chicago winters.

17. I won’t miss my next class reunion.

18. This move may send my ex to Georgia…need I say more?

19. MANY opportunities to run into my short ex and his freakishly tall cohort.

20. I’ll be ever so much closer to the REAL Acorn money.

CONS:

1. I’ll need more xanax.

2. Oh yeah, I’ll need a winter coat, gloves, a scarf, ear muffs, boots and those cool hand warmer things that you can also stick in your shoes.

So, what do you guys think? Any constructive suggestions will most assuredly be considered. Also, if you’d really like to see me stick it to an ex who has left me no others coices, let me know. I can use all the help I can get.

Now, all I have to do is get there.

:):)